To the one waiting at the edge,
BS’D
Shalom!
Before Every Workshop, I Doubt.
Before every workshop, I feel this underlying anticipatory anxiety.
Will it fill?
What about the finances?
Why even do something like this?
And I want to take this moment to declare something outright:
I have self-doubt.
I am a doubter.
I doubt myself.
It sucks. It’s true.
There’s this part of me that wants certainty—a guarantee that it will work, that it will land, that it will all be okay. And yet, every time, I’m met with the same invitation:
Step forward anyway.
So now that I’ve put that out in the open, I want to share something that’s been really real for me.
The Space Between Fear and Trust (or, Why my Brain is a Drama Queen)
There’s a moment—the exact moment—where we jump.
Where we don’t have all the answers, but we say yes anyway.
That Na’aseh v’Nishma moment. The place between hesitation and surrender. The breath before we leap.
I felt it this week. A moment where my mind wanted to run—to check my phone, to distract myself, to reach for anything that would give me control. But I caught it.
And let’s be real—it wasn’t pretty.
It wasn’t some cinematic moment of enlightenment. No orchestral swell. No wise sage nodding in approval. Just me, gripping reality with white knuckles while my nervous system screamed:
🚨 DO SOMETHING. ESCAPE. FIX IT. PANIC. 🚨
My pulse spiked. My breath got shallow. My whole body tensed like it was bracing for impact.
But I didn’t.
I let myself stand in it.
Not reacting. Not escaping. Just breathing.
And right there, in that fragile, ridiculous, holy space, I felt something else—the Name.
The Name that shows up when there is nothing else but IT.
Not as an abstract idea, not as a distant force, but as the structure holding me up.
Because isn’t that what sanctity really is?
Not something we impose on life, but something that reveals itself when we stop resisting it.
Maybe you’ve felt it too.
It shows up in those small, split-second moments of choice:
🔹 Right before you walk into the house—when you can either carry the weight of the day inside or take a breath and start fresh.
🔹 Right before you pick up your phone—when you can either reach for distraction or sit with the moment as it is.
🔹 Right before you take that bite of chocolate cake—when you can either feed the craving or pause to ask, what am I actually hungry for?
🔹 Right before you press “maybe” on an RSVP—when you can either keep waffling or just say yes to your own transformation.
That space.
That’s the threshold.
That’s where the Name is waiting.
What This Has to Do With Breathwork
This exact moment—the place between fear and trust, between resistance and surrender—is what breathwork is all about.
At the Hineini Breathwork Retreat, we’re not trying to "fix" ourselves.
We’re not here to force our way through blocks, push past discomfort, or pretend we’ve mastered anything.
We’re here to sit right at the edge of that space and let ourselves actually feel it.
Through breath, movement, and guided exercises, we’ll explore:
🔹 Vulnerability – Dropping the masks, letting ourselves be seen, and realizing we were never alone.
🔹 Acceptance – Meeting ourselves exactly as we are, without needing to fix, force, or fight.
🔹 Trust – Learning how to lean into something greater, even when control feels safer.
🔹 Letting Go – Releasing the grip, the tension, the endless mental loops—and seeing what remains.
🔹 Surrender – Not as giving up, but as giving over—allowing ourselves to be held by something bigger than us.
This isn’t about learning new ideas.
It’s about experiencing ourselves fully, in real-time, in a way that words can’t touch.
Breathwork is that space.
The place between the mind’s noise and the body’s truth.
The exact moment where we jump—where we accept the Name fully and let it hold us.
So, Why Are You Still Overthinking This?
If your brain is currently doing that thing where it half considers it, overthinks it, then distracts itself with five other tabs—I see you.
I see the part of you that wants this but hesitates.
I see the part of you that’s scanning this post, waiting for a “sign.”
I see the part of you that already knows.
And this is your moment.
📅 February 20th-23rd | 📍Morristown | ⏳ Limited Spots
Because what if you’re not standing at the edge of uncertainty at all?
What if you’re standing exactly where you’re supposed to be?
And hey—even if you’re reading this and you know you’ll never come to a workshop, that’s totally okay.
What if this is just a reminder that Hashem is the best, and He gives us every opportunity to be in relationship?
Whatever your path looks like, Hineini.
I’m here. You’re here.
And maybe that’s the whole point.
Maybe the Name has been here this whole time, just waiting for us to notice.
Best,
Moshe Haim
P.S. Trust is a journey, not a destination. Be patient, dear ones.
P.P.S. Healing and self-discovery continues. If you feel the call to deepen this work, to truly step into the light of your own being, I invite you to join us at the next Hineini Retreat. It’s a sacred space where these shadows can be fully explored, embraced, and transformed. Come, be a part of a community that supports you in this dance of reclamation and renewal. You deserve it.
Because this image makes me smile.
The unknown will always look vast. The edge will always feel uncertain. But
the path reveals itself only when you move. You
don’t have to see the whole way.
You don’t have to have it all figured out. Just
step.
The sea will part when your foot touches the water.
